by American Kabuki
Once again I face a move before the end of the month. This one outside my control. Many of us are in the same situation and its not likely any us will remain in the same location. There's kind of diaspora occurring, friends are still friends, but we seem to be congregating in location nodes of some sort around Morocco. I am not really sure what that means but I can see it happening. Could be just Source spreading the love around. You feel good one place but not another and you go by that. Could be geography, resources, Internet connections, business needs or just people you click with at that moment. Doesn't mean you love the others any less.
I guess I AM at a point where I feel life calling me to new adventures. I am not sure what that is, or what that looks like, but if we have learned anything from Heather while being in Morocco it is how to follow the energetic trail that Source lays in front of us. We don't have to choose that trail, but its always that path where everything flows and we will end up there one way or the other, as greater parts of us direct us. Its often not what or where we expect. But its always for the best.
I've had over 16 million page views on blog since I started in February 2012. Since April my blog income has been cut by over half. Part of that was someone hacked my blog and inserted a ROBOTS.TXT command to disallow the Google Doubleclick search engine. Basically denying Google indexing to the very thing that feeds me, the blog ads. I fixed that but now I am noticing something new, the ad views counts I get don't at all match the page view counter on blog. Dani has complained for a long time Google has been altering her pageviews and seems to have proof of that based on the views her articles get at nesaranews.com, but this is the first time I have seen it happen to my blog. Its perhaps verification I am on the right energetic trail when it comes to what I blog about.
So I am going to have to adapt how I earn a living from this blog because from what I can tell just in the last week I have had 150,000 page views but that is not showing up in the ad revenue and I don't think the advertising dollars have shrunk per ad that much. That may mean I have to do computer work again and blog less. It may mean I have sell American Kabuki Coffee mugs or t-shirts on my blog or something else creative to provide the daily needs. I really dislike asking for donations - saw far too much of that in religion. I can live on $400 month in Morocco but I was earning 3 times that in revenue when I came here - and I like to have a more normal life than I do now.
I miss my daughter terribly. I have loose ends in the USA that need tidying. I have a divorce that needs to be finalized so I can move on with my life. I have a driver's license to replace which California will only issue if I re-apply in person. Mine was stolen by a pickpocket at the Ceuta border in February. Morocco car rental places have been very good about accepting the photocopy of the license but that won't work in Europe. I have a part of me that feels I need to return to the USA for a while... or perhaps just for a quick visit, I am not really sure. I have no home there anymore, my wife and I separated before I came here (and that was inevitable). To restart a life fresh there takes about $3000-4000 plus the plane trip home. And I am little old to crash on my brothers couch. I've got CPAP machine (prescribed for my sleep apnea) that needs maintenance, I can tell my O2 levels are dropping at night from the dark circles under my eyes in the mornings. The energetic trail will tell me where to go, and will provide the funds to do it (or not). But like many others here, I am walking in the unknown right now.
My immediate need is a new place to live before the end of the month and that takes money to move and often deposits of some or another. Morocco is definitely cheaper than the USA, but as a tourist there is an implied time limit I can stay here... Got hassled a little bit about that last time I crossed the Morocco border, although I have complied with all laws in that regard. I suspect the border guys were just a little pissy about having to work through the biggest holiday of the year. First time I have had any issues, and they didn't bother Caleb who has been here longer than me.
I have been thinking about maybe doing a tour of Europe to see my readers, not exactly an "Opal tour" kind of thing but something simple and intimate with people of like minds. I am not completely sure who would show up or if anyone would, but then I am kind of self-deprecating guy anyway. I am always a little surprised by how many people do read my blog. Those of you in Europe or Asia, that have an interest in me paying a visit, or hosting a venue for that kind of thing, and hearing a bit about this journey, contact me at one of the contact addresses on the right side of the blog. I have no idea how I would pay for it. But I remember Brian Kelly expressing a desire to me when we were in San Diego to cross the USA doing an RV tour.. and well he did it! And he didn't have the money for it then either.
I am not a stranger to Europe, especially the UK and France, but there's other places I have not seen, like Scandanavia, Czech Republic or Croatia. China or Thailand would be interesting too. My French abilities are marginal, I am working on that with Rosetta Stone lesssons. My Spanish is worse. My lingua franca is English.
If you can help financially this month it would be of great assistance. There's a PayPal link at the top of the page. The need has never been greater or the situation more uncertain. I do feel change is occurring. What it is I do not know. With a 150,00 page views in the two weeks, even a simple $1 a month from a small fraction of those viewers would go a very long ways. I must be doing something right to have the readership I have. The numbers speak for themselves. We shall see where the Universe leads to the next adventure.... It may be here in another location or perhaps the stars... who knows...
I love you all. And I love bringing you information that I find.
-Bill / American Kabuki